Does your little one prefer to play on their own rather than join a group activity? Or do they get grumpy on overnight family visits? That’s okay! In fact, it’s normal: more than half (56,8%) of people worldwide identify as introverts, according to a 2020 Myers-Briggs Type Indicator sample.  

Your child is still developing. While they may show introverted traits now, this could also change as they get older – or not. Either way, keep the following tips in mind when raising a child who appears introverted.  

Keep things private  

As much as possible, avoid reprimanding or scolding your child in public or in a group setting – rather pull them to the side. The same goes for positive interactions. Sing their praises, but do it in a way they are comfortable with; perhaps that’s simply by allowing them to overhear you speaking to others about them. When you’re around other people, reassure your child with physical touch – a gentle pat on the back when they’ve done a good job, or a hand on their shoulder when introducing them to a new person.  

Foster open communication  

Allow your child to share their preferences and express their emotions with you without showing judgement. Encouraging open communication – and listening attentively – makes it easier for them to trust you.  

The same goes for your communication with others about your child. Be open with teachers, family and friends about them needing ‘alone time’ in a group setting. Help others understand and respect your child’s needs, especially when you’re not around.  

Respect their boundaries  

Boundaries are not reserved for adults; young children can have them too. It is, however, difficult when you don’t know what those boundaries are and your little one doesn’t know how to voice them.  

To better understand your child, educate yourself on how introversion works (if you’re not one yourself ). Boundaries could look like the physical ways in which they prefer to interact with others, or the amount of time they’re comfortable spending in group settings. If your child prefers to have a quiet Saturday morning, reading or watching their favourite TV show, give them the space to do so. Help their siblings and other relatives understand this need for time alone.  

People-pleasing is an easy trap for introverts to fall into, so help your child set healthy boundaries and practise ways they can reinforce them in various situations.   

Build their confidence  

If there’s an upcoming school or family event, prepare your child with some at-home role-playing. Share some of the questions they may get asked and go through possible answers with them.  

Another way to boost their confidence is to model appropriate social behaviour when you’re out in public. Show them it’s okay (and even pleasant) to say hello to a peer in the grocery store. Keep interactions short and sweet so they know they can control how much time they spend with others in unplanned scenarios.  

It’s a good idea for your child to join a cultural or sporting activity (that they show an interest in) at school or privately. This way, they’ll see the same faces every week and will gain the necessary social skills without that being the sole focus. Help them figure out their strengths and support them in pursuing their passions to boost their self-esteem.  

Words by: Shani Tsai  

Photography: Gallo/Getty images

Also read: 5 Ways To Raise Grateful Kids In An Entitled World