Stress is an unpleasant, but entirely natural part of life. When we encounter something we perceive to be a threat, or feel under pressure, our bodies release the hormones adrenaline and cortisol as part of our fight-or-flight survival system. This may have worked for our ancestors, but in today’s world when we’re connected digitally 24/7, constantly bombarded with social demands, work, and confronted with crises on newsfeeds and social media, our stress levels can remain high. Don’t let stress build – take practical steps to manage it by doing the following:

STEP AWAY

When you feel overwhelmed by a major work project or life crisis, get up and move away. Fetch a cup of herbal tea, take a walk outside – put distance between yourself and the source of your stress for even a few minutes, and focus on breathing deeply.

GET EXERCISE

Research constantly reiterates its benefits in relieving stress and releasing feel-good endorphins that raise your mood. Factor a 20-to 30-minute walk, swim, cycle, gardening session or any other activity into your day. 

EAT TO BEAT STRESS

Avoid refined sugars, caffeine, alcohol or nicotine, which cause your energy and mood to lift, then plunge, leaving you feeling more stressed than before. Opt for a healthy, balanced diet that’s high in whole grains, vegetables and fruit, with enough protein and omega 3 fatty acids, to keep your mood up and sustain it.

SET BOUNDARIES

Leave your work at work, or allot a set period, such as an hour after supper, for checking emails and catching up. Make it quietly but firmly clear that you are not available for anything except genuine emergencies after hours, and return the respect to others.

LEARN TO SAY NO

If you are too accommodating, ask yourself why. Do you lack self-esteem? Do you fear losing love or favour? If necessary, talk to a therapist. ‘Remind yourself that when you say no, you are refusing or delaying a request, not the person asking for it,’ says Gauteng-based Clinical Psychologist Dr Colinda Linde. Apply this to invitations too: Be ruthless in reserving your time for the things and people you truly want to spend it on.

PRIORITISE

When it comes to things you can’t say no to, prioritise them and manage them. It gives a sense of control instead of stress. Stephen Covey’s ‘Time Management Matrix’ can help: Categorise each task by urgency and importance. Do what is urgent and important; delegate what’s urgent but not important; date what is important but not urgent (so you can tackle it timeously); and if something is neither urgent nor important, just drop it!

FOCUS ON WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL

If you can’t do anything about a situation (that volcano erupting on the news, that awful boyfriend you wish your daughter/mom would stop seeing), forget it. Even if you’re an atheist, paste the Serenity Prayer above your desk: ‘Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.’

LET GO OF PERFECTION

It’s not possible to achieve, and it is a path to stress, self-loathing, depression and paralysis, as you become afraid to put anything out there that may be less than perfect. ‘Embrace imperfection and periodic failure as an important part of growing,’ Linde says.

GET SUPPORT

When you feel stress rise, call, email or WhatsApp a friend – or if need be, speak to a therapist. Sharing problems with someone you trust makes the burden feel lighter and can help you see solutions.

SMILE

Studies have found that simply putting a smile on your face or making yourself laugh can relieve feelings of stress. It seems our brains are linked with our facial expressions and emotions, Linde says. And when we smile or laugh, those around us are likely to, reinforcing the lighter mood, and giving a better perspective on a problem. (Can it really be that bad?)

HAVE A MASSAGE 

Whether it’s a Terres D’Afrique crystal ball, full-body massage using African botanicals at Jennifer Eales, or a simple foot massage at home from a friend using cocoa butter, touch can be wonderfully soothing.

DANGLE CARROTS FOR YOURSELF

Have something small to look forward to each day, whether it’s playing with the dog, watching MasterChef or having a long bath with a good book. ‘It doesn’t have to be significant or cost money,’ says Linde. ‘The point is to have a period of downtime daily when you are just in the moment and not busy, even mentally, with work.’

GIVE GRATITUDE A GO

Make an effort to look back at your day and remember three good things, however small, or to look for them as you go about: a tree in bloom, a cat basking on a wall, or even the foam of a fine cappuccino. Committing yourself to looking for the positive will help you find it, even on stressful days.

Word: Glynis Horning